Everything is Grace

I realize I have been away from this quite some time, so I figure it's time to finally post an update on here. As many of you who read this know, I am spending the summer working for a machine shop in Minneapolis, Kansas, which has been quite a blessing for me. Currently I am reading a book entitled "Everything is Grace" about the life and way of Therese of Lisieux. I have found that the title of this book and life of St. Therese captures the philosophy by which I have been trying to lead my life in the last few years.

From my earlier posts it is pretty easy to see that I look up to people like St. Josemaria Escriva and Mother Teresa who were both big advocates of obtaining holiness in the ordinary ways of life. St. Therese states, "Holiness is not necessarily a matter of great actions, but of letting the Lord work in us and through us in the ordinary experiences of life." I suppose I am drawn to this track of spirituality because I'm just an ordinary guy myself. I've never stood out in anything I've done;never been the smartest guy, never been the best athlete, far from being the holiest guy, don't pray as much as I should, ect. Despite all of this however, I have had one thing going for me...heart. I don't give up. You can knock me down in sports, in life, in my walk with Christ, but I'm going to get up and keep striving. It gives me great hope then to know that ordinary people like me obtained sainthood, and more importantly holiness through ordinary means. This has really opened up my eyes to the simple things in life that we all too often take for granted.

I hear people say that they look out into the world and see all the greed and crime and evil and find it hard to see God. But I ask how you can look out into the world and not see God. Just the other night I was blessed to spend some time with some of my best friends sitting on in the bed of a truck on a dirt road watching the sunset. It is artist Gina de Gorna who states that, "To watch a sunset is to connect with the Divine." I couldn't agree more. There's just something so peaceful about watching the streaks of pink, orange, yellow, and purple progress across the sky until they slowly fade to black as the stars begin to show up. It is there if we but slow down long enough to see it, to recognize that everything is grace. It serves as a reminder to me that no matter what, God has and will always love me.

To answer the people who ask how God can let good people suffer let me propose the following analogy. One of the blessings I have living in a small town this summer is free time. After 3 years as an engineering major, I didn't know the word existed, but I have discovered that indeed it does. I have decided to use much of this free time lifting weights and working out again. The irony of weight lifting is that as you lift the weights, your muscle fibers are torn apart, weakened. It is only after your muscles fibers have been made weak that they can be built up stronger than they were before. So it is in life and our faith journey. Only after enduring trials and being driven to our knees are we able to once again stand, stronger than before. Once we are able to accept the trials, we can begin to offer them up and obtain the graces from redepmtive suffering. It is at this moment that we can imitate Christ by turning our instrument of tortue and suffering into a tool of love and life and grace. I once read the following on suffering, "He who would excercise his power of redeeming to the utmost limit, as Christ did, must not shink from that which awaits all saviors, the cross. Souls are won by words, they are won by example, but above all they are won by sacrifice."

Lastly, I would like to briefly touch upon the topic of happiness, as I feel it is something that we all strive for, but is a concept that our society has twisted that we no longer know how to obtain it. Many people equate success with happiness. Therefore a good definition for happiness could be found in John Wooden's definition of success. ""Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming." This would explain why you see happiness in owners of large companies, or parents of large families, or those who have accomplished great feats. Yet there are many people with the same accomplishments that are not happy. And the reason for that is they are lacking God. Therefore I would propose a slight change to that definition to read, "Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do your best to become the person God has intended you to be." I was talking to a very good friend about life and the paths we had traveled to reach the point where we are today. The subject came up that at various points along the way things had gone completely unaccording to plan. All the plans we had made were dashed as God led us down a completely different path. Being the sports nerd that I am, I made the analogy that living life was like batting in baseball, and sometimes God just through curveballs our way. My friend proceeded to tell me that if I ever learned how to hit curveballs, to let her know. Well, I don't that I've entirely figured that out yet, but driving home to Minneapolis, Kansas a theory began to form in my head. And it should come as no surprise to many of you that the inspiration came from a country song, "Roll With It" by Easton Corbin.

Roll with it. The line continued to play through my head long after the song had finished. I was instantly reminded of my conservation with my good friend and my analogy. Roll with it I thought; There's something to that.  I started thinking back about my curveball statement and began to think first of all about baseball. Why do batters miss curveballs? Well that's easy I thought, they are expecting something else. I repeated that again in mind. They are expecting something else. Expectations. That's it! Now I'm just as guilty as anyone about this, but we all have a tendency to make plans for our lives. For example the summer before my junior year I made all of these plans in my head. I was going to work really hard getting in shape and lead our soccer team to a winning season and get post season honors along the way. I was gonna work hard in school and in my clubs and qualify for nationals and get lots of scholarships. The plans was there, and I was prepared to put all the work and effort into it that was necessary. But God had different plans. Better plans. Sure I still achieved some of the things I had planned, but God helped me to achieve so much more. I developed a much stronger relationship with Christ and grew in leaps and bounds in my life. I was brought into contact with some of the people I know call my best friends...friends I probably would never have met if I hadn't gotten involved in things like TEC and Steubenville. These friends in turn helped and are still helping to shape me into a better man. We make all these plans and do all the work to make it happen and we EXPECT things to turn out just like we planned. We get tunnel vision and so set on this track we have constructed for ourselves that we are completely oblivious to the path that God has already constructed for us. We are like horses with blinders on, so set on only that which is before us. Now I'm not saying we can't have dreams and work hard to reach those dreams. But there is a big difference between dreams and expectations; of preparing for the future and planning the future.  If we are preparing ourselves for the future, we will be ready to react to that curveball when it is thrown our way. We will be able to set aside our dreams and the path we were following and set out on the new course God has laid before us. But if we are planning the future, we are going to strikeout on that curveball as we take a hack at the fastball we were expecting to come our way. So to conclude this train of thought I would just ask all of you to try and become more aware of those little graces God has placed throughout your life: sunsets, thunderstorms, wheat fields, that kind word from a friend to say I understand, whatever it is that God uses to speak to you. Most importantly, make a concious effort to PREPARE for the future and not plan for it. God Bless.

Trust in You

For this past month or so I have for spiritual reading been pouring through the pages of "Come Be My Light", the private writings of the "Saint of Calcutta" (Mother Teresa). It is a tremendous read and I highly recommend it no matter how far you are in your walk of faith. As I have read and reflected upon the thoughts and life expressed in these pages, one thing continues to pour forth from the pages and greatly humble me: Mother Teresa's never wavering trust in God's plan for her life.

For example the book goes into "the call" Mother Teresa receives to start the Missionaries of Charity. She originally receives this call in September 1946. However, it is not until August 8, 1948 that Mother is granted permission to begin this endeavor after having to convince her spiritual director, archbishop, Mother Superior, and Rome of the divine nature of the call. Yet, as in each setup she encounters in life, she does not doubt the plan God has for her. Rather than viewing those people as "setbacks" to the plan, she sees that God's will is being made known through them. They are not disabling her from carrying out God's plan, but serving as tools of God to enable her to see the plan. She accepts all these things, regardless of how different it might be from the way she expected things to work.

I am greatly humbled by this ability to trust because it is a virtue that I am lacking. In fact, I still remember the first time I began to question God's plan in my life (you all should get a kick out of this and how shallow I use to be). It was the summer after my 8th grade year at St. Mary's School. It had been a fun year, but challenging as well. I had lost my grandmother to cancer, and it was the first big loss I had experienced in life. After having made the decision to attend high school at Mulvane High School over Kapaun Mount Caramel, I began making big plans for high school. I was going to get really good grades and be involved in a lot of clubs so I could get scholarships for college. I was going to come in and be a force on the soccer team and lead the team in assists (I played midfield at that time) and go on and play in college. You see, my dad had played basketball in college so I wanted to play a sport in college too as I knew that would make him proud and that is how I planned to pay for college. Plus soccer wasn't as popular in Kansas, so it wouldn't be too hard to land a scholarship. Well, then "it" happened. The first or second day of soccer camp I broke my foot, stress fracture to my 5th metatarsal. Without putting a screw in, it was going to be 9 months to rehab (3 months on crutches, 3 additional months of no running, and then 3 months to rebuild my leg muscles and get back to where I was at). So on top of missing soccer my freshmen year I had to miss basketball as well, and I was going to have to work really hard to be ready in time for spring soccer with my club team. How could this happen. I mean, didn't God know this was going to really set me back and hurt my chances for playing in college? Haha, why yes I think he did, and I think that was the plan. Because I suddenly had some spare time on my hands, I changed around some of my classes for the second semester and got into "Automotive for Everyone" my first class in the shop part of the school. I got along with the teacher really well and he talked me into signing up for some more shop classes and really got me interested in engineering as a possible career choice and perhaps giving up my dreams of playing soccer in college to pursue engineering. In the words of Eric Church, "I thank God I ain't what I almost was."

Yet, trust is still something I struggle with. To borrow a term from Andy Grigg's song "She's More", I think I along with most people fall into the trap of creating our own "paint by number fantasies."

You know what I'm talking about. We come up with these "conditions" that if met we think will make us "happy." For example, for myself I would like for nothing more than to end up back around Wichita with a good engineering job with a company like Spirit or Cessna or Koch; get married start a family, pass on all the family traditions, pass on the family name. But I can't let my plans get in the way of me following the path God has laid before me. Mother Teresa once again holds the key here: devotion to the Blessed Sacrament. Mother was adament that the Blessed Sacrament was held in the chapel of the newly formed Missionaries of Charity so that the sisters could visit Christ every day. She knew that if Christ was there, they could fact any difficulties, any "setbacks" that might come their way. We would be wise if we realized just how true this is.

To end with I'd just like to leave you with the following quote I found.

"When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer."

Lock In Talk

I guess I should begin by saying that when I told April and Sara that I would help plan out this lockin, I didn't imagine that would require me to be giving a talk. I should preface this talk by warning you that I have no original thoughts of my own, so the majority of this material is borrowed. Not only that, but a large chunk of this material is borrowed from Fr. Bernie Gorges, who also never has an original thought of his own, so much of this material is double borrowed. The great thing about being Catholic is that we can call this "Tradition" which sounds so much better than plagerism.

To begin I would like to focus on a Bible quote from Proverbs 27:17 "As iron sharpens iron, so man sharpens his fellow man." This simple quote holds what I believe to be the key on the journey to becominga more Catholic man. Men need other men to look up to, other men to hold them accountable and continue shaping them into the man God has called them to be.

One man making headlines recenty is Tim Tebow, quarterback of the Denver Broncos. Now people have come up with all sorts of reasons to dislike Tim Tebow: the way he throws a ball, the fact he plays for the Denver Broncos, his popularity, or the fact that he prays while on the football field. The truth is the reason people dislike Tebow goes much deeper than that. Tebow's actions make others feel uncomfortable because he raises the bar on what is means to be a man in today's society and exposes the shortcomings of those around him. Our society is in need of more men like this to step up and challenge this social norm. In America the divorce rate hovers around 50 percent for first-time marriages. 22 percent of all pregnancies in the United States end in abortion. 26 percent of children under the age of 21 are being raised in single-parent households. Our economy is weak, but our families are weaker. Just the other day I was watching an episode of Extreme Makeover Home Edition. They were rebuilding a house for a family who had lost their song....a sixth grader who had hung himself because of bullying. Our society is desperate for men to rise up and become leaders. To quote Casting Crowns song Couragoues: "We were warriors on the front lines standing, unafraid; but now we are watchers on the sidelines while our families slip away. Where are you menof courage, you were made for so much more.!"

So I began to reflect on how we as men can embrace true masculinity and through prayer and perseverance, become the men God has called us ot be. During that reflection I came up with four main themes we should seek to live out in our lives: men of prayer, men of sacrifice, men of accountability, and men of hope.

men of prayer
First and foremost we must be meno f prayer, and seek to build a healthy prayer life. In particular there are three aspects of prayer I believe we must focus on: devtion to our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament, devotion to our Blessed Mother, and developing a daily prayer routine.

We as Catholics are blessed to have the opportunity to visit our Lord each and every day through daily mass and adoration. Yet I find we often take this blessing for granted and fail to make time to receive the grace God freely gives us through the Eucharist. Concerning the devotion to the Blessed Sacrament in Adoration, Mothre Teresa, says, "The time you spend with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament is the best time you will spend on earth. Each moment that you spend with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament is the best time you will spend on earth. Each moment that you spend with Jesus will deepen your union with Him and make your soul everlastingly more glorious and beautiful in Heaven, and will help bring about everlasting peace on earth." This devotion will not only strengthen your relationship with Christ but grant you the wisdom and grace to make important decisions in our life. As some of you may know, I live in a Catholic men's household at Kansas State called Chi Rho. As part of our spiritual development there, we have priests from around the state visit each week to give us talks to further our faith formation. One of the priests who frequently visits, Fr. Bernie Gorges, challenged all of us men ot make an effor tto make it to mass at least one other time a week besides Sunday Mass, and it's a challenge I entend to all of you. As a priest, he realizes the grace available to us in the Eucharist. I'd like to show you a little demonstration illustrating grace (Fr. John grace demonstration).

We must also hold a devotion to our Blessed Mother Mary. Devotion to the Blessed Mother draws us into a deeper relationship with her Son. The rosary in particular holds as a powerful weapon to combat the evils present in today's world, especially for men. Frequent praying of the rosary is commonly used as tools for pro-life movements, vocational discernment, and obtaining a greater purity in one's life. More so, reflection upon the mysteries of the rosary can lead us to a greater understanding of our purpose in life and which roads to take in life. In particular, I would like to reflect briefly on the Joyful Mysteries.

1. The first joyful mystery is the Annunciation. (Read Luke 1:26-38) (reflect upon verse 29, "She was greatly troubled at what was said and pondered what sort of greeting this might be.") This is very similar to our own experience with God's plans and events that happen in our lives. We are troubled, worried about how things will work out. We would be wise to follow Mary's example here in the first mystery by pondering, praying for wisdom and then having the courage to match Mary's Fiat, her yes to God's plan for her life.
2. The second joyful mystery is the Visitation. (Read Luke 1:39-56) As soon as Mary says yes to God's will, she immediately departs to serve others. Likewise, we too should seek out opportunities to serve those around us.
3. The third joyful mystery is hte nativity. After saying yes to God, Mary has the courage to allow God's plan to come to fulfillment. We have to be able to walk the walk, and not just talk the talk.
4. The fourth joyful mystery is the presentation in the temple. After God's plan has come to fulfillment, Mary and Joseph give time ot thank God for the gift he has bestowed upon and them and place their child into God's hands to receive the gracesHe bestowes on all people. How often does something good happen for us and we forget to give thanks to God for his gift to us?
5. The fifth joyful mystery is the finding of the child Jesus in the temple. What I believe this mystery shows is that while we are instruments in the hands of God, we always have move to learn, more room to grow into holier men and women.

Finally I belive we must strive to develop a daily prayer life. As men we are called to be spiritual leaders, whether in the family, as priests, or in consecrated single life. As the spirituality chair for the Catholic Household of Chi Rho at K-State, I can personally tell you that you cannot hope to direct or lead a group of individuals along their spiritual journey if you yourself don't have a solid relationship with Christ. This means developing a set routine reach day to spend growing in friendship with Christ and seeking Him in your life. This can be accomplished in numerous ways: daily Mass, frequent Confession, Liturgy of the Hours, prayer points, a set time to pray each day, Adoration, and much more.

men of sacrifice

• As men we will be called to sacrifice in life, whether in our families, as priests, or in religious communities.
• Begin with small sacrifices such as fasting from food, alcohol, television, ect. By mastering themselves in small things, men will have greater control of themselves in serious matters and will be better prepared to combat the temptations around them.
• "For by the constant practice of repeated self-denial in little things, with God's grace you will increase in strength and manliness of character. In that way you'll first become master of yourself and then a guide and a leader; to compel, to urge, to draw others with your example and with your word and with your knowledge and with you power."-St. Josemaria Escriva
• not of our nature, developed through discipline.
• will aid us in our purity
• power of redemptive suffering as a sacrifice
• sacrificing for others brings us closer to our brothers and sisters
• example-Maximilian Kolbe

men of accountability

• "as iron sharpens iron, so man sharpens his fellow man"
• mission of Chi Rho
• Our goal must not be simply to reach heaven, but to bring others with us.
• invite others to mass
• courage to call people out when they slip up
• love the sinner, hate the sin
• "What finally counts is not just that there are good spiritual men and women in this very chaotic world, but that there are communities of Christians who together listen with great care and sensitivity to the one who wants to ake his healing presence known to all people."-Henri Nouwen

men of hope

• if down the road we expect our families or parishes to have in God's plan for their own lives, we must first have open in God's plan for our own life.
• As men I would say one of our greatest struggles is in feelings of inadequacy. This can often transform into feelings of despair when we fall short. We must have hope in God's plan for our lives and faith that God has given us the gifts to accomplish all he has lain before us.
• Must have hope in trials. Many of us are arriving at the point in life when we realize that live is difficult and full of trials, but must continue to hope in our future.
• "Life is a storm. You will bask in the sunlight one moment, and be shattered upon the rocks the next. What makes you a man is what you do when that storm comes."-Edmond Dantes, Count of Monte Cristo

"If"-Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep you head when all about you are losing their and blaming it on you; If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowance for their doubting too; If you can wait and not be tired of waiting; or being lied to, don't deal in lies; or being hated, don't give way ot hating, and yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise.

If you can dream and not make dreams your master; if you can think and not make thoughts your aim; if you can meet with triumph and diaster and treat those two imposters just the same; if you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools; or watch the things you gave your life to, broken, and stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools.

If you can make one heap of all your winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss, and lose, and start again at your beginnings and never breathe a word about your loss; if you can force your heart and nerve and sinew to serve your turn long after they are gone, and so hold on when there is nothing in you except the will which says to them, 'hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue; or walk with Kings nor lose the common touch; if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; if all men count with you, but none too much; if you cna fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds' worth of distance run; Yours is the Earth and everthing that's in it, and-which is more-you'll be a Man, my son!"

and as an added bonus as promised, the official Chi Rho wedding song.

a disregarded gift

       So the other day amid a very stressful day, the lyrics of a song just sort of popped into my head, and it was exactly what I needed to hear. I have to admit, I'm not a very big fan of Nickelback, but I'll give them credit for their song "If today was your last day." The line of the song that truly hit me was, "...each day's a gift and not a given right." As I began to reflect upon this phrase, I realized I haven't been living with this truth in mind.

       Each morning I've been waking up with a sense of entitlement. Entitlement to have an equal opportunity to pursue my own desires, my dreams for life;entitlement to happiness here on Earth; and especially for me, entitlement to have things the way they use to be; in particular my health. Growing up you could say I was pretty injury prone. Injuries I could deal with, that was just part of being involved with sports as well as part of being a boy. What I wasn't prepared for was the health problems that were in a sense, beyond my control. Growing up I'd always been a fairly physically active kid; I loved being outdoors. When I wasn't at soccer or basketball practice, I was out running, playing pickup games, or just enjoying the outdoors playing capture the flag or something with friends. I ate reasonably healthy, drank lots of water and milk, the whole 9 yards. So that's what it was a surprise for both my doctors and me when I was diagnosed with hypertension and later a congenital heart condition. At first it didn't really give me much trouble. But as I noticed it beginning to affect me, I quickly grew frustrated. Frustrated I couldn't do the things I use to do. Frustrated that I had to endure something that I had done nothing to warrant. Worse than my own crosses though were seeing those close to me enduring suffering: my brother's,cousin's,friend's, and family putting up with autoimmune diseases and other health ailments. What hurt most was watching it affect their lives as it killed off some of their dreams and forced them to make adjustments in their lives, yet remembering who they use to be.
    I finally realized this situation was very similar to those people wondering why bad things happen to good people. I've had far too many friends die young, and it's only human nature to wonder why. You'll hear the phrase "life's not fair." Well that's because we all have this mindset of entitlement; entitlement to have the same opportunity to live life and chase our dreams. When this doesn't happen, we often feel that the person who isn't given that opportunity is cheated, slided, short-changed. My brothers and sisters, who are we to be entitled to anything? Each morning you wake up, the thought that you "have to endure" another day of sufferings doesn't need to cross your mind. Each morning is a time to rejoice, for truly each day is a gift from God, a blessing from above! We would do well to remember that. Yes life is going to be hard, but God places so much in our life each day to remind us of the gift He is giving us: the sunrise, the sunshine, people in our lives, the sun set, the beautiful landscapes, the comfort of family, friends, and having a home, a cozy fire, and so much more.
    It has been said "We place our happiness in other people's hands." How true this is, and how often we are let down. We as humans, and even more so as Americans, have come up with a solution: we'll medicate ourselves. When reality becomes too overbearing, we'll either escape reality or create our own. This is why alcoholism has become such a big problem here in the United States, especially among college-aged students. At a point in life when things can be pretty stressful and unclear, alcohol provides a way to escape it all, atleast for a while. Now i'm not some big prohibitionist who thinks alcohol is a bad thing; quite the opposite in fact. But the way in which we use it can be quite unhealthy, both physically and spiritually.  And it's not just alcohol, each of us has our own self-prescribed medication. For some it's throwing themselves into their work, their job, their career; seeking the satisfaction that comes with achieving a big feat for their company or themselves and they become ever-more dependent upon that feeling. For others it's cutting other people down in order to feel better about themselves. Everyone has their own way to cope. But of all these people we turn to in search of happiness: ourselves, our family, our friends, many of us forget to seek the one person who can truly grant us happiness and peace. He tells us each and every day how much He loves us in the simplest things as I mentioned above: the sunset, breath-taking mountains and waterfalls, the people in our lives, and so many other ways.
    Yet we continue to give in to despair. We give in to the pressures and the stress and lose hope. This is why I have made it my personal mission to do the small things in life: hold the door for a stranger, listen to friends when they are having a rough day, wish them luck on exams/interviews/ect., surprise them with a letter or card or gift. ect. It's through these small things that we can restore hope in people's lives, and hope is something we all need to believe in. Here's a few good reminders from scripture.

Romans 12:12 "Rejoice in hope, endure in affliction, persevere in prayer."

Isaiah 40:31 "They that hope in the Lord will renew their strength, they will soar as with eagles' wings; they will run and not grow weary, walk and not grow faint."

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the Lord, plans for your welfare, not for woe! plans to give you a future full of hope!

To wrap things up just like to leave you with some lines from the song "Every time you run" by Manafest.

I promised not to quit and I remembered the words
Every time you run, every time you hide

Every time it hurts, every time you cry
Every time you run away, every time you hide your face
And it feels so far away, I’m right here, with you

And as an added bonus for all of you who enjoy some Christmas music.

Guidance and the roadmap to life

So I figured I'm well overdo on updating this thing. Im not going to even try and fill in all the details since my last update. So here's the brief synposis. Definitely had my share of valleys in life. Had to watch several friends struggle with some crosses in their lives while feeling completely helpless in assisting them to carry their crosses, which is hard for me. For as long as I can remember, I've always been the guy people come to when they needed advice, or just someone to listen to them. Also, life has been presenting me with my own crosses of late. The end of this summer I was diagnosed with a heart condition. While nothing life threatening, I do have to travel to Cleveland to meet with a cardiologist at a clinic there to see what my options are to take care of it. Needless to say I've been struggling alot lately with trusting God's plan for my life. Which leads me into my first main topic.

Earlier this semester I was blessed to have the opportunity to serve on a retreat geared toward college students. While serving on this retreat, my friend Autumn mentioned something in her talk that I desperately needed to hear. In sharing  her own attempt to follow God's plan for her life, she brought up the term guidance. Now a cool way to think about guidance is the following statement: God yoU and i DANCE. Now in dancing, if both people try to lead the dance, well it's not going to work out well, and it's not going to be a very fun dance. But if one person concedes the lead to the other, and follows the lead of the other person, things work out very smoothly, and the dance is quite enjoyable. So it is in life. As long as I am trying to fight God for control of my life, things are going to be pretty rough, and I'm going to be unhappy with my life. And the things is that if I wasn't so caught up in my own plan and agenda, God has written this message out in so many areas of my life. Most obvious are all the scripture passages concerning our futures:

Jeremiah 29:11 "I alone know the plans I have for you, plans to bring you prosperity and not disaster, plans to bring about the future you hope for."

Proverbs 16:9 "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the LORD establishes their steps.

Reflecting on my own life, I can see how true this is, yet I continuely try to take control of the wheel. And by getting caught up with all these plans and dreams of mine, I miss some of hte greatest gifts God gives...I miss the present moment and all the simple delights found in life. I was reminded of this the past two weekends when driving home from Manhattan. Now some of you will probably think I'm kinda weird for saying this, but I absolutely love Kansas. It has been wonderful growing up here and I want nothing more than-God willing I should have a family some day-the opportunity to raise a family here in Kansas. While driving home the past two weekends I have seen one of my favorite sites, and one reason I love Kansas so much:
the sun setting over the pastures and fields of the Kansas country side. For whatever reason this simple phenomenon of life fills me with such peace and love of God...yet I often miss out on the opportunity to experience it beacause I get so wrapped up in the "life" I create for myself. So I have challenged myself to start slowing down more and simply enjoying the little things

The other topic I wished to touch upon is in light of all the news and media I've heard lately. I read the newspaper fairly regularly and lately all I've been hearing about is how Ashton Kutcher cheated on his wife again, the scandal surrounding Penn State University, how our economy is shambles, protests are going on all over the US, and all our Congress can do is fight with one another (oh and declare pizza sauce a vegetable so pizza can still be used in schools...great use of tax dollars right there folks)...and other similar stories.  One question has continuously been running through my head....where are all the real men?

Recently the Men of Chi Rho went and watched the movie Courageous. In the song "Courageous" by Casting Crowns, there is a line that I think answers my question quite well, "We were warriors on the front lines;Standing, unafraid

But now we're watchers on the sidelines
While our families slip away"

Edmund Burke once said, "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing." I believe this is exactly what we are seeing in today's society. Men are too content to settle for good instead of great. In reading some books by John Elredge, I have realized that for the vast majority of men, their greatest fear is failure. The questions that dogs them their whole lives is, "Do I have what it takes? Am I really a man?" In the fear of falling short of this, men have ceased to take risks....ceased to make a stand for the truth. This inaction is allowing evil to corrupt and destroy our  society.

In the war of the mind

I will make my stand
In the battle of the heart
And the battle of the hand
We were made to be courageous
And we're taking back the fight
We were made to be courageous
And it starts with us tonight

Our sisters in Christ are under attack now more than ever. Society tells them they have to look a certain way in order to be beautiful....to act a certain way in order to be accepted. Self image continues to deteriorate in youth and materialism continues to run rampart. According to society if you look a certain way and have all these things then you will be happy. Where are the men proclaiming the truth to happiness? Aside from the few men preaching it up in the pulpit, I don't hear it. Most of us have lost sight of the truth. We fall into the trap laid by the enemy. If I don't have such and such job and make so much money and provide for my family, I'm not a man. Lies my brothers!

When was the last time you told one of your sisters in Christ how beautiful she was or how much you enjoyed her company? Too long ago I fear for the great majority of us. Hence rises one of the worst problems men battle in today's society: pornography. Satan's no dummy...he hits at the core of weakness. Afraid of failure or rejection? Satan provides a solution that takes away the risks of the situation and seemingly provide all the rewards. Yet this is tearing our society apart. And worse it has led even more to the objectification of our sisters in Christ. Where are you men of courage?

And the problem doesn't stop with just our sisters in Christ. Now, this evil permeates all aspects of society and has infiltrated our leaders and now our economy and our countries are wavering. Well men, it's time to stop being spectators. This weekend I was blessed with the opportunity to watch my brother's soccer tourney. As the games went on I listend as parents yelled at their sons for making bad passes or not making the right plays, yelling at the refs for missed calls...myself included (still just a bit competitive). But as I got to thinking, I use to be a player myself. And it's one thing to sit on the sidelines and complain about how things are going...but it's something completely different being out on the field...to be an active participator. Things don't always go perfectly, but you don't complain. You just keep working and keep giving it everything you have. This is what frustrates me most about the Occupy Wall street, and occupy this and that. These protestors are nothing more than spectators on the sideline, complaining about the calls life has thrown at them. They can see something is wrong, but they aren't doing anything to fix the problem. Men, it's time to stop sitting on the sidelines and time to start being active participators in life. It's time to man up and face our fears....to take risks for the things that are most  important in our life.

Most importantly we cannot forget we are in this alone. Christ arms us to ride into battle...gives us strength to make a stand. We are provided so many opportunities: mass, confession, the rosary, adoration, and so much more but we don't take advantage of the blessings God places in our lives. In the words of G.K. Chesteron, "The issue is now clear. It is between light and darkness and everyone must choose his side."

Esto vir! (be a man!).

the pillars of the framily

A little over two years ago I was blessed to become part of a group of individuals that has since become known as the "framily" (friends as close as family). The term was originally coined by a group of close friends who met on their candidate Teens Encounter Christ (TEC) retreat. It wasn't long however, before the term was picked up by the much larger TEC community. At first this made our original group a little upset, as we felt the term had been "stolen" by people who didn't realize the origins of the word, or the people involved. But as we soon learned, the term had evolved to stand for much more than a group of friends. It now stood for a community of love; a community of hope. The friendships formed on events such as TEC are so strong because for once in our lives, we aren't soley concerned with our own selfish desires, seeking what we get out of the friendships. The friendships formed at these events are formed during the "God moments" of the individuals lives, simultaneously experiencing God's agape, his selfless love for us. It is this agape that acts as the adhesive, the bond that joins these friends together and makes them so strong.

Just the other day I was talking with my dear friend Brooke about the identity of the framily, and came up with the following pillars in our community:
1. Eucharist/Adoration
2. Devotion to Mary
3. Liturgy of the Hours
4. God-given fun (swing-dancing)

1. Eucharist/Adoration. Being that the Eucharist is the source and summit of our Catholic faith, it is only fitting that it is the main pillar in our community. I think for the great majority of the framily, our devotion to the Blessed Sacrament either began or was greatly strengthened at the Adoration/Penance services of our TEC retreats. Personally, I would like to see the sacrament of Reconciliation celebrated simultaneously with Eucharistic Adoration more often. The gift of our Lord in the Eucharist is not one we should take for granted. It is such a blessing then to spend some time in reflection in the presence of our Lord before Reconciliation so that we may ask Him to allow us to see more clearly and to see ourselves as we truly are. Then after purifying our souls and washing them clean of the sins that have kept us from being in communion with our Lord, we can immediately fill ourselves with the graces of the Lord by returning and doing our reparation for our sins in the presence of our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament. For me, this is one of the most beautiful parts of the TEC weekend, getting to see the candidates and even the team members released from the chains of sin that have held them as slaves for too long. In correspondence (snail mail) with some of my close friends from the framily, I have noticed in closing their letters, my friends Steph and Tony often conclude with the following life: see you in the Eucharist. The simplicity of that statement almost makes us lose sight of those implications. Right now we are so blessed to share in one another's company. But there is a time when we will have to part ways (we are experiencing a smaller form of that in our return to our various colleges and high schools). But we are the disciples of our age. And although I'm sure the disciples enjoyed one another's company immensely, they didn't just stay in one town the whole time and enjoy this agape they had discovered. No, they went out into all parts of the world; each to his own place, following their individuals mission's in life. Yet they were united in one thing: Christ, and his body given in the Eucharist. They were bound not only with one another, but those that had gone before them and reached the heavenly goal. So though we made be spread apart: from Dallas to Wichita, Manhattan to Lawrence, even clear out to Boston and New York; we are united together as friends; as a community, the Body of Christ, we we participate in the sacrament of the Eucharist. What a blessing my brothers and sisters! Who else can say that their friends, after a night of fun, close the night (or morning as it's usually about 2 am) with a visit to our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament.

2. Devotion to Mary. Many of the framily has consecrated themselves to our Blessed Mary. (sorry i'm a little behind on this, it will happen, i promise).  St. Louis de Montfort stated that "It was through the Blessed Virgin Mary that Jesus came into the world, and it is also through her that He must rein in the world." Total Consecration to Mary, explains St. Louis de Montfort, "consists in surrendering oneself in the manner of a slave to Mary, and to Jesus through her, and then performing all our actions with Mary, in Mary, through Mary, and for Mary." Even those of us who haven't consecrated ourselves hold a devotion to our Mother in our prayers, especially through her weapon she has given us to fight evil in our world, the rosary. I can't remember where, but I read somewhere (i think in a max lucado or scott hahn book) about an analogy of Mary in the Old Testment story of Rebekah helping her son Jacob deceive his father Isaac in order to gain his blessing. Genesis 27:1-45 contains the whole story, a bit long for this post, so i'll sum it up. Isaac promises his blessing to Esau. However, Isaac is of old age and is blind.Rebekah, wanting the blessing to go to her son Jacob, tells Jacob to  bring her some game with which she will prepare a meal for Isaac. Rebekah then dresses up Jacob in the skins of animals in places Isaac would come in contact with Jacob so he thinks it is the hairy Esau. Jacob gets the blessing in place of Esau. Anyway, to the analogy. In the story, Rebekah takes Jacob's gift (the game) and embellishes it, makes it more pleasing to Isaac (turns it into a scrumdiddlyumptious meal) and adorns Jacob in Esau's best clothes and prepares him to receive his Father's blessing. Likewise Mary takes our gifts to God and emblishes them with her own love and makes them pleasing to our Lord and adorns us to receive blessings from our Heavenly Father.

3. Liturgy of the Hours. The following are quotes I took from http://www.universalis.com/ concerning the Liturgy of the Hours. The Liturgy of the Hours (also known as the Divine Office) is the richest single prayer resource of the Christian Church. It provides prayers, psalms and meditation for every hour of every day. It has existed from the earliest times, to fulfil the Lord's command to pray without ceasing. “The purpose of the Divine Office is to sanctify the day and all human activity.”

“The Office is... the prayer not only of the clergy but of the whole People of God.”

Pray is such an important party of our relationship with God, yet we often fail to make adequate time for this time with God. The Liturgy of the Hours is one way to help implement this time into our schedules. But like all things, it is a commitment made much easier in community, with brothers and/or sisters to hold you accountable. For those of you not familiar with the Liturgy, I'd definitely suggest talking to your friends that are familar. It is something that has definitely helped my own faith life. I'd recommend to start with just saying Night Prayer out of the Liturgy. Once you have this as a staple in your schedule, then you can begin to implement morning and evening prayer. After this, if you are really ambitious, you can implent the rest of the Divine Office.

4. God-given fun. The greatest part of the framily is that they can have a good time without falling into all the lies of what this world says is "fun." One of the most common ways we achieve this is through swing-dancing at country clubs. One of the greatest parts of swing dancing is teaching new people (especially new Tecies). It's almost a right of passage anymore. Make a Tec. Learn to Swing dance. Then you are officially part of the Framily. But everyone needs to have fun in life, and we are no exception. Aside from swing-dancing, lakes/ponds would probably be the next in line under activities of God-given fun. Whether it's trying to hurt ourselves in a competition at Joel Arnold's to see who can land upright on a canoe or just running out to Cheney lake *cough* mudhole * cough*. And of course there's just the many conversations we have. And with our group, it seems like the later the conversation, the better. Especially on TEC retreats. Although I'll have to say that "man talk" with Tony Seiler, Jesse Elpers, Ryan Rausch, and some other guys in the kitchen at 1 or 2 in the morning at the Spiritual Life Center drinking hot chocolate is one of my personal favorites.

So keep the fire burning guys, keep growing in your love of Christ, and let's keep making memories to take and share with others as we enter into our missions in life.

Summer musings

So after being bugged by people this past weekend to update my blog, thought i'd get around to that. Had a lot of thoughts going through my mind this summer, so try to cover some of those.

I'm not going to lie, the beginning of this summer, I was pretty disappointed. Disappointed I didn't land an internship and disappointed that I ended up back at Arby's, the place I told myself last summer I'd never set foot in again. But here I was, stuck in a job I didn't really want to be at. The worst part was I worked a lot of nights, so I  missed opportunities to see friends. But July came, and with it some different opportunities. Because of the hours I worked at arby's, and the times I had off, I was able to help a friend out with "Hero's camp", a similar summer program to Totus Tuus. Working with the younger kids has always set my heart on fire. To be able to see how far along they are already in their faith journey compared to where I was, to be able to see our church's future, to be able to experience the joy and energy of life through the eyes of these kids, it is such a blessing. And then I got the opportunity to work a TEC retreat with a man who has had such a positive impact in my life. Along with that I met some amazing new friends, friends I needed to make at this point in my life. And as I got to thinking, all of this would probably not have been possible if things had gone the way I had wanted them to. Once again, God's plan for my life was so much better than what I had planned. A verse I was reminded of was Philippians 4:6 "Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, make your requests known to God."

And as my last post touched upon, I've been doing a lot of thinking about trials and suffering in our lives. I was reminded of this by the news, hearing of the thousands suffering the famine in Africa as well as the families in Norway mourning the loss of loved ones in the terrorist attacks. One of my candidates on my table at the TEC retreat and now dear friend of mine shared the following quote with me from St. Francis De Sales, "The everlasting God has in His wisdom foreseen from eternity the cross that He now presents to you as a gift from His inmost heart. This cross he now sends you He has considered with His all-knowing eyes, understood with His divine mind, tested with His wise justice, warmed with loving arms, and weighed with His own hands to see that it be not one inch too large and not one ounce too heavy for you. He has blessed it with His holy name, anointed it with His consolation, taken one last glance at you and your courage, and then sent it to you from heaven, a special greeting from God to you, an alms of the all-merciful love of God." When looking at suffering and our daily crosses in this life, we must remember that we are in this world, and not of it. Our goal is to reach heaven and to live happily with our Lord in Heaven for eternity. To use an analogy, let's look at weightlifting. When lifting weights to gain muscle, the muscles are actually torn so that they can be rebuilt bigger and stronger. So it is with the trials and suffering in our lives. We are torn apart, allowed to feel pain now on Earth, that we might be built up stronger than before so that we might one day hopefully obtain our goal. 1 Corinthians 10:13 reads "No trial has come to you but what is human. God is faithful and will not let you be tried beyond your strength." 2 Corinthians  4:17 hits the nail on the head when it says, "For this momentary light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison." Finally Romans 5:3-5 states "Not only that, but we even boast of our afflictions, knowing that affliction produces endurance, and endurance, proven character, and proven character, hope, and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us. Let us grow to have the faith of the Kirishitan Martyrs, who ran and embraced their crosses on the hill. "
Five children ranging in age from 12 to 19 were among those killed on February 5.

Ibaragi Kun from Kyoto--at 12 years of age the youngest of the group--from Kyoto was admired until the end for his remarkable courage in the face of death.

Shortly after they were led to the place of their execution, an official came to him and begged him to recant his faith. Young Ibaragi Kun looked his tormentor squarely in the eye and replied, "Sir, it would be better if you yourself became a Christian and could go to heaven where I am going. Sir, which is my cross?"

The stunned official pointed to the smallest of the crosses on the hill. Ibaragi Kun ran forward, knelt in front of his cross and embraced it like a friend. Along with the others, he sang praises until he could sing no more

The last major theme I'd like to touch upon is marriage. It is no hidden fact that in today's society marriage has lost it's honor and is often held in low regard with the increasing number of divorces as well as increasing number of people living together without being married. One reason for this is the lack of commitment to anything by younger generations. Another reason is the loss of respect for women. But the biggest reason is that we have forgotten that marriage is more than the attraction between a man and a woman; marriage is a covenant. The Catholic Catechism of the Catholic Church states in 1601 "The matrimonial covenant, by which a man and a woman establish between themselves a parternship of the whole of life, is by its nature ordered toward the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of offspring; this covenant between baptized persons has been raised by Christ the Lord to the dignity of a sacrament." We know marriage to be meant for life because in Genesis 2:24 God says, "This is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two of them become one body." If we read further in the catechism on the effects of marriage, we read in 1640 "Thus the marriage bond has been established by God himself in such a way that a marriage concluded and consummated between baptized persons can never be dissolved. This bond, which results from the free human act of the spouses and their consummation of the marriage, is a reality, henceforth irrevocable, and gives rise to a covenant guarenteed by God's fidelity. The Church does not have the power to contravene this disposition of divine wisdom." One final Bible quote makes God's will on the subject known, Mark 10:9 "Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate." So if all of this evidence is in the Bible, what has happend to the sacred bond of marriage. Well, as I said, we have forgotten that marriage is a sacrament, a bond, a covenant entered into by a man, a woman, and God. It is not just a civil union between two individuals. In order to begin to mend this serious wound we must begin with two key steps: restoring the dignity and respect of woman and by better discerning our vocations and who we marry. The fault lies in both genders. I feel many woman find a guy who they like, but whom they feel they can fix his faults or change those parts of him they don't like. Well, more than likely, you aren't going to change him. Yes, there are some bad habits you might get him to kick, and you might even get him to change his beliefs for you, but you aren't going to get him to change who he is. And if you do, he's not going to be happy. Which will only bring about tension and unhappiness. With the men, they often forget they are called to sacrifice; sacrifice for their wife and the good of the marriage. We are to love our wives as Christ loved the Church. In case you've forgotten, Christ died for the Church, the ultimate sacrifice. Brothers and sisters, we hold the future in our hands. The decisions we make and the things we take a stand for will determine what is accepted in the future. As G.K Chesterton states, "A dead thing goes against the stream, but a living thing can go against it." We must make a stand if we are to change what society has deemed acceptable.